I thought you heard me. I couldn’t have been more obvious. I said exactly what I needed to say but I might as well not been in the room, well mentally at least. Did you realise that you are looking down on me? I can’t help but think if I was born a man you would have listened up.
I’d never really noticed before how much I was disempowered; easily dismissed from a room. You obviously don’t think much of me. I’m just good enough to look after the children and nothing else. Sometimes, especially at church, you think I get even that wrong. She’s too noisy, or distracting. Can I not just keep her distracted at the back? I hear the surprise when my husband looks after her, or that it’s his turn to put her down to sleep. Is he babysitting you ask, as if he gets an automatic get out of jail free card? Yes, he cares for her just like me and should I choose to ever get a job he will be just as responsible for her wellbeing.
Don’t think I have forgotten the time you were surprised to hear me tell you I was a pharmacist. Just because I am a Mum now doesn’t mean that I’m not capable. That I don’t have thoughts and opinions in my own head. And yes it’s a place I used to get more respect, despite fighting a system just because of my sex.
These are my experiences. I grew up in a man’s world. A world that has barely moved on from the experiences of the women at the tomb. The women who went to the disciples and who were easily dismissed. For why would Jesus reveal his resurrection to a woman before a man?
Jesus, I come face-to-face with you today as who I am; experiencing your resurrection as you reveal it to me.